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In memory of the baby
9 Replies
lennie - August 31

How do you memorialize your baby? Is it helpful for a mother's recovery over the lost?


Lydia - August 31

Do we really need this? In my case I don't do any memorialize because it would only make me feel sad. I think for those whose miscarriage was on the second or third trimester it is applicable but I don't think it would help in recovering the lost.


Stella_Peter - August 31

I lost my baby during the second trimester because my baby stops growing and it was a stillbirth situation. I always make it a point to remember her through the ultrasound pictures that I have. I would consider doing these things in memory of my baby. It makes me feel that she is near and I'm happy about it.


kAtRiNa - September 14

I am thinking of the opposite in order to move on. Looking at the photos of the ultrasound or even the medical receipts makes me lonely. I don't know why it affects me that way. On the other hand, remember the baby we loss is really sweet but I just can't take it.


GirlTalk - September 22

I think remembering the baby will not help during the early stage of the pregnancy loss. Maybe in the longer run it will be appropriate when the mother has recovered and accepted the loss.


Nikki1790 - April 16

I dont agree with anything anyone has said here, i believe no matter what stage u are at in pregnancy weather it e ur first second or third, it is a horrible, traumatic thing to suffer, people cope with things in diffrent ways, and if haveing something to remember your lost baby by is how you want to cope with things and learn to deal with things then do it, why ask anybody else thier opinions. And nobody has any right to tell anyone that if u miscarry during ur first trimester, that it is somehow wrong to remember your baby.


jo1980crawford - April 19

Every person copes with grief differently and there is no right or wrong answer it is down to the individual at the end of the day. I have said goodbye to both my angel babies in my own way as it was my way of dealing with the loss of my babies. the first was a second trimester loss and the second was an early pregnancy loss, i felt the same grief with both even though there was a massive gestational age gap.


melissae1 - July 17

You should do whatever feels right for you.

I bought a beautiful flowering plant for the garden to remind me of my baby because it is a physical thing I can lok at that makes me smile. I look out of the window and it's there, so it brings me peace. I m/c at 7 weeks.


JessieT - September 8

I had a missed miscarriage 3 months ago. The heartbeat had stopped at 9 weeks, but i didnt find out till my 12 week scan. I opted to do it the natrual way which took 3 weeks to kick in and ended up putting me in hospital for the blood loss. I had to have the baby removed in a internal examination. That day, i was wearing a little leather and silver braclet that my mum had brought me as a present. And i havent taken it off since that day when i had my baby. Its the only thing i have from that day, and i could never be with out it.
My partner also brought me a plain silver ring, in rememberence of our baby, which i also havent taken off since the day he brought it.
I feel these little bits have helped me. Also if you have a scan picture or docs notes etc, keep them in a box together :) I have a scan picture, my hospital wristband, everything, in a box. My baby box! Good luck to you all x


ah26 - September 19

I agree with Nikki1790, dont ever let anyone tell you that you shouldn't do something because you were 'only' in your 1st trimester!! Doesn't matter how far gone you are it's still painfull. Everyone's situation is different and everyone copes in different ways but never be affraid to do what you think's right for you in grieveing for your baby!!

Like JessieT, i also kept my wrist band from when i was in hospital having my baby. I have the scan pictures. I find it really comforting to look at it sometimes and other times i can't face it so keep it near me but closed and when i feel i want to see him, all i have to do is open it.
My colleagues in work bought me a white rose tree which sits outside my front door, so everytime i come in or out of the house i see the tree and think of our beautiful baby.

You must do what's right for you.



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