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Miscarriage advice
4 Replies
Kellyy82 - August 23

Hi Ladies
I have never posted on here before, but i have been trying to concieve for almost 3 years, and last month i started on clomid, and fell pregnant straight away, i did the test on the wednessday and almost immediatly started bleeding,and have been bleeding heavy for almost 8 days heavy. Doctors confirmed i am miscarrying after numerous bloods and a scan. This is now my 2nd pregnancy loss, and I am unsure of how i am going to get through it again. I am trying not to show my pain, but inside im crying, and am sick of the stupid comments people make, for example- you can always try again. I have a 5 year old daughter, and really wanted a little brother or sister for her. Any advice from anyone who has been through it or going through it

 

hindiko - October 9

Hi,
Welcome to this forum site, here you get 100% knowledge of your questions.
In medical fields this forum site have a great experience. The learner who can want to answer of their questions use this forum site and get answers.
At present I am not able to give your answer please contact to your friends or experts.

 

Fortisfertility - May 6

Hi kellyy,

already you have a 5 year old daughter,so you dont want to cry within you for this miscarriage..you can consult your gynaecologist again

 

zaisa - September 11

miscarriage is an unfortunate incident that is beyond our control. not your fault neither anybody's fault. it's okay to cry, that's what people do when they get hurt and believe me, it helps.

 

talktalkcontact - September 28

let yourself grieve

Many of the women I talked to were surprised by—and unprepared for—the intensity of their grief. “I'm a nurse, so I know how common miscarriage is, and I even knew intellectually that it was probably hormones making me feel sad,” remembers Beth Resweber of Swarthmore, PA, a mom of four who miscarried after having her second child. “But I won't lie to you: I was pretty upset.” A sympathetic ear can make all the difference. If you don't have friends who know what you're going through, find a support group locally or online.

but don't be surprised if you don't feel much emotion at all

“Does it make me sound terribly cold to say that I wasn't that upset?” wonders Georgia Hallinan of Richmond, CA, who miscarried when her son Emmet was 4. “I mean, I cried when I started bleeding, and I felt sad for a few days, but I always knew I'd get pregnant again.” (She went on to have two more kids.) “A few days after the miscarriage, I thought, well, at least I can drink again. So I called a friend with a son Emmet's age and said I wanted to spend the afternoon sitting on her deck with a beer while our kids played in the yard.” The visit was low-key: They didn't even discuss the miscarriage, Hallinan remembers. “But it cheered me up to be back out in the world.”

expect misguided comments, even from good friends

Angela Ferguson of Fairdale, KY, who miscarried several times between her daughters Savannah, 9, and Raina, 20 months, was astounded by the insensitive comments she received. “People would tell me ‘Oh well, at least you have Savannah' and ‘Maybe it was for the best' or—my personal favorite—‘At least you weren't very far along.'”

Try to remind yourself that people don't mean to be hurtful. They probably feel helpless, and awkward, so they blurt out the first thing they think of. Unfortunately, that first thing is seldom “I'm so sorry. Is there anything I can do for you or your family?”

If you're feeling brave, you can meet insensitivity head-on. Tonia Nester of Redford, MI, mom of Owen, 3 1/2, and Avery, 14 months, was devastated when she miscarried her second pregnancy. When hurtful comments added insult to injury, “I'd look people right in the eye, and say, ‘This baby was real to us, not something I can replace like a lightbulb in a lamp. My family and I are devastated by this loss.’ I wasn't confronting them to be unkind, but to make it clear that I wasn't willing to brush my grief aside with clichés.”

 

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